A guy caught my attention in the mall. I kept staring at him so that he looks back. Following his instincts, he searched for the eyes which gazed him. I blinked quickly to assure that it was me. He smiled.

I pulled up my brows asking him what is he looking at ? He gestured with his hands that my eyes are beautiful. I blushingly closed my lids. I blew out my pupils to his muscles and danced my eyes to compliment his gym body. He turned pink.

He invited me to nearby coffee shop. I angrily glared back and directed him towards my family. He requested me to pull up my veil so that he can see the face which adorned such beautiful eyes. I pulled down my net and turned my back.

His restlessness was apparent in mirror. I pointed finger at my veil and signalled him that it’s enough for now. His innocent eyes and folded hands melted me.

So I turned and pulled up my net. He sighed and smiled. Pulling my eyebrows, I asked what now ? He swing his neck slowly to both sides and fluttered his eyes like dancing in his head. So I started blinking my eyes quickly but he gave confusing look. I blinked my eyes slowly & repeatedly just to have some fun.

Thinking with my pupils up, I puzzled him and pointed him to find these eyes and left in hurrily after my mother.

there was emptiness inside
i tried to fill it with 
companionship, entertainment & leisure
but the trench grew deeper
broke through essentials of
confidence & courage
i wandered without aim
in maze of experiments

my eureka occurred 
when I decided to focus
to a goal, worthy or unworthy
there were upsets
but trench started to heal
there was an aim now
i unleashed myself
hit the bazooka

momentary contentment intermitted
but heart became thirsty
it started craving for more 
one after another

life turned into a war 
battles were won 
or lessons learnt
on various fronts

sky is shallow now
still the hunger is unsatiated
but emptiness has healed

Through Feet

Goa is best explained by its sea waves which rush towards you with tranquility and takes away the sand beneath your feet along with all the troubles, leaving you in divinity. The sea teaches one more thing. To deposit all its load on the land and swirl with waves.

The same Goa gave me another experience when in middle of night sitting beside the swimming pool I saw the light flickering over water giving colour to wave, enlivening the pattern of curvy lines which danced with the movement of my legs. It made the starry night a bliss leading to transcendence.

Through Eyes

Just like boiling milk, waves creates bump in sea, approaches the coast with horrendous sound & breaks to create a lot of froth. Than it just silently kisses the beach  with a promise that i will come again. And it comes again and again and again.  This promise shows that love between wave & beach is an immortal one. I think that is the reason why tender honeymooners choose beaches to mellow their relationship, to witness this immortal love story and imbibe it between them.

The view of blue above waves is endless making it difficult to understand where is the horizon. The sea and the sky seems to melt into each other and are inseparable. I think its the second love lesson.

When you are in goa, sun hits you at the back lighting up the yellow sand and turning it into gold spread. I am happy its not, otherwise another love story would have succumbed to greed. The sun rises, shines fiercly over the beach and sea. Scaring them, testing them but finally gives up and gulps down in horizon as in their arms. This shows the power of true love.

It happens everyday. It happens everyday because i think nature wants to tell this love story to newcomers and also to oldtimers to remind them, to realize their immortal love and let sea swallow their differences.

Scolding boss, reprimanding colleagues,
Nagging parents, distant friends,
All becomes history with a sight of beast on two wheels.

The sound of vroom rushes up adrenaline,
The click of clutch flags off the journey with soul away from the mesh of world,
Cutting into the air I move forward into bliss of unknown,
Landscape changing with every milestone,
The wind in the hair releases the strain,
Sucking up sweat and soothing the nerves.

The lips start humming a song from Sathiya 
(O suniyo re…),
The mind starts buzzing ‘Staying alive’ by Bees Gees,
Revving of engine remains the lasting melody.

Floating into sea of air worries dissolve,
The soul emerges afresh from a plunge in holy Ganges,
With helmet overhead and backpack on shoulders,
I feel like a warrior in Battlefield of Kurukshetra,
Ready to take on enemies in war of dharma.

Among the penetrating eyes of world I feel naked. I feel so bare that when I face mirror I see myself through eyes of lecherous males. I have even lost the sight of seeing myself through. The inner self is out of question or does it still exist ?

In eyes of world, I may be grown up but I am that same young girl before she realised that she is an object. In those days I used to hide behind my mother. Now the things have changed. The difference is I hide behind the mirror wondering why I had that realisation or why I was born female ?

Some respectable men of society does nothing but ogle. These arrow of sight makes me uncomfortable, ashamed & helpless. The eyes scan & strip me in public. It kills a life. It happens everyday like slow death. I wonder how is that not murder or rape.  I wish they do something so that I can retaliate. I could not reason out how to encounter those gazes ?

I want to feel as person. A living soul not a dead object. I want face mirror not hide behind it. I want to keep that young girl’s innocence intact. But how much I may try, the process is continuous. I wonder when will it stop ?